I’ve really lost my sleeping in habit, I mean I never really had one before but I feel like it’s just gotten worse now. So last night I drank a bunch of beers, went to bed around 2 am and somehow I was up by 7:30 this morning. I didn’t feel super refreshed but I didn’t feel the need to sleep in anymore. Is this a good thing? I am not sure, I mean I sleep at 9-10 pm everyday… so I guess my schedule is self maintained?
I really wish I was one of those lucky people in the world who can function on just 4-5 hours of sleep, the amount of stuff you could get done with those extra couple hours in a day! Productivity could be ridiculous! I am feeling super busy lately but I am really not sure if I am being productive or not. I find myself wanting to learn everything possible from programming to chess to photography on top of everything else I am currently working on right now. However, I have learned to also constantly remind myself to focus on the big three I set out for myself at the beginning of this term: climbing, reading, and working out.
My climbing has improved! I have managed to complete a bunch of V3s, I am hoping to really be able to pump most V3s and start working on V4s in a couple of weeks and also my canvassing. The fucking angled walls are hard. My reading is really coming along too. I have finished my fourth book, Elon Musk’s biography. I am really thankful for this relaxing job in which I get a solid hour or two of just reading in the work truck. On top of that I really try to get a solid 20 minutes of reading at home just before bed. My gym habits have not seen as much improvements though. I have grown accustomed to the new workout although I end up missing a day or two on the weeks with overtime work and my random schedule. I don’t necessarily think this is such a bad thing as long as I keep this habit up and push through this 8 week workout in the long-term I will be fairly happy.
Having just finished Elon Musk’s biography this morning, I can say it Elon Musk is a fucking god. After reading this title and Job’s biography I have noticed that both of them share very similar personality traits. The first and foremost being ambitious as fuck, not worrying about the status quo but pushing for their own visions and goals and doing whatever they have in their power to push and inspire other people to help him accomplish those goals. This trait has taught me that you have to be aggressive to get what you want in life. You have to take those leaps of faith and really put you’re money where your mouth is. If you aren’t willing to lose everything you have then you aren’t investing all that you have in order to reach your own goals.
Another trait I noticed more in Musk than Jobs is their world vision and long-term goals. It seems these two tech powerhouses have always had a goal or vision they are constantly striving to reach and that is what gives them the discipline and self-determination to constantly make technological breakthroughs. Although I see this as a very valuable personality trait, I really find a lack of it in myself. I am in engineering, it is going ok, but is it really what I want to do? Maybe if I put in more effort I would truly be able to tell if this is what I want out of my life or not, but at this rate, I have no idea where I am going in life and I think one of the biggest reasons I am pushing myself to develop a reading habit is to help me find my own life goal. At this point, everything sounds super cool to me if framed properly. Jobs made me want to be a great tech marketers, selling people life values rather than just fancy phones. Must makes me want to find a job in which I am willing to just sleep under my desk and devote 100% of my life into creating something that I can truly be proud of.
The last trait that really stuck with me after reading about Elon Musk is his strong attention to detail and laser focus on his projects. My last work term, I was told my attention to detail was shit, and I kept rationalizing myself to be an intuitive person and that’s why I had bad attention to detail, but I realise that calling myself as an intuitive person is not an excuse to lack such a crucial skills. especially I want to make something long-lasting. Elon’s ability to focus on his projects at hand and detach himself from the emotional connection to the project and his workers has really propelled him to dominate the markets he is occupying right now.
Ok i am really feeling the lack of rest catching up to me now. My thoughts aren’t really connecting and my eyes are drooping. I think I should’ve taken a nap today instead of just bringing a bunch of TV. Not the best idea, but wow did I finally have a relaxing day of literally doing nothing. It sounds good, but I think I can do without having a lot of these. It is nice not doing anything for a whole day but at the end of the day you just feel poppy. I mean I am tired, but I feel neither physically nor mentally drained… we’ll because I am not…
Hm, what else is on my mind? Oh I’ve been giving Tinder a shot, but god my Tinder game is horrendous. How do you people make conversation with these girls? I feel like I’ve never make it past the small talk and I fucking hate small talk. Guess I will just have to keep trying… practice makes perfect right?
Only have 5 days of work next week! Hopefully… It’s nearing the end of the week and we are behind on the surveying points, so maybe I will have to put in another Saturday or Sunday. I mean I don’t really mind but I haven’t had a full weekend to myself since week 1… Hopefully next week will be chill, I am aiming to finish 1984 by George Orwell and maybe get started on Malcolm Gladwell’s books. Not sure if they are super good books, but I’ve listened to his Revisionist History Podcast and I think he did a really good with the narration.
I hope my typing skills have gotten better from these 30 minute sessions every weekend. I think it is good to let my thoughts and write for a little bit at the end of every week, but when I am in a state like, I feel like I am just a little too tired to truly have an effective brain dump.
On another note, I had a fucking amazing cheat day yesterday. Rice cakes with peanut butter and Nutella is fucking amazing. I really wonder how this diet is working out because I ate so much garbage yesterday. Maybe I should take the carrots and replace it with cauliflower or something because carrots are carb heavy and break down fairly easily. I still got another 5 lbs to get through, so I guess I will work my way through that first.
And that’s a wrap!